I'm thrilled to report that the premiere episode of Secret Diary of a Call Girl Season 2 did not disappoint! In fact, I think I'm already liking the pacing of the show a lot more than last season, and the introduction of two new characters is making me wish I could get my fix more than once a week.

We're just one episode in, and the stage has already been set for a very fun season. Belle meets the charming Alex after a hotel bar mix-up and it turns out he wants to date her, not just bed her. What a gentleman. There’s also a new kid on the block named Bambi (Ashley Madekwe) who's looking for some old-fashioned call girl mentoring -- and she happens to be a certified scene-stealer with some pretty damn deft comedic timing, if I do say so myself. And of course there's Ben, still secretly pining for Belle... Oh Ben, the two of you need look no more, you’ve both found what you’ve been looking for -- now just admit it, dammit!

Anywho, on to my highlights from last night's season premiere:

Best Belle-ism
“Aren’t we all whoring ourselves for the man? Of course not. I’m literally whoring myself. It’s different.”

Valuable Takeaway
Prostitutes actually do kiss on the lips and the idea that they don’t is a myth (well according to our girl).

Most Memorable Scene
Belle dressed up in a cheap French maid’s uniform relieving herself on a politician in a hotel bathroom.

Did You Know…
Actress Billie Piper was pregnant during the filming of the second season. They used two body doubles and strategic clothing to try and hide her pregnancy.

LOL Moment
Bambi: “Oh, I’ve come up with a name, I want to be called Bambi, because that’s what people used to call me in school.”

Belle: “Bambi. Right. Because you’re quite doe-eyed?”

Bambi: “No, it’s 'cause my mom got shot.”

Next Week's Teaser
Is Belle getting breast implants? Noooooooooo! Everyone loves a natural whore!

Written by Nadine Sharon Anglin