For horndogs, summer is it: flimsy clothing clings suggestively to sweaty bodies and the smell of sex is in the air. Thing is, most of us are stuck inside from 9-to-5, leaving all those acrobatics largely to the imagination. Well, if you're fantasizing instead of working, you may as well do it properly. These links are worth your daytime attention—consider it schooling for the after hours party.

First up, the veteran. Cosmopolitan magazine is offering some scientific-sounding "strategies" for summer sex. Let's see here: "have sex slowly"... not really quantum physics. Next idea, "play with ice cubes." Thanks for the reminder, but come on, give us something new. "Use cooling, minty lube"—no thanks, I hate mint. Moving on—"have sex on the floor"? What does that have to do with summer? Oh Cosmo, you haven't changed. So pretty on the outside, but not much on the inside, is there?

The Bachelor Guy hasn't much use for Cosmo either. His summer hijinks consist of mocking the mag's water-based sex positions—like the Sexy Sprinkler, a bent over doggy-style approach meant to take place above a sprinkler. What will we need, Bachelor Guy? Among other things, "a woman willing to be outside, bent over, completely naked, cold water shooting into her 'genitals', with soaking wet hair. And running mascara." Funny how the Bachelor Guy sees this, and the women of Cosmo do not.

Sexuall.org has got its own roundup of hot weather sex positions—though they're not too enjoyable, judging by the blank expressions on the bathing-suit wearing models. The oral sex pics are particularly great, with the automatons forced to pose their expressionless faces near chlorinated, nylon-encased crotch. What is this site, anyway?

This is fun: summertime "recipes" for safer sex. For example, the banana split—"one (or more!) banana condoms, one part vanilla lube, one part chocolate lube, topped off with a squirt of cherry lube." Clever approach, but the sad thing is, we all know that tastes like ass (and not in the good way).

Now here's something we can all get behind—"Randy at the Beach," a very dirty threesome story from Nerve.com's summer sex special. Ooh, more hot weather erotica: a selection of sweaty vignettes from the Austin Chronicle. Lazily flipping through smut seems like just the ticket for a humid aft, actually. The best libation to have on hand? Sex on the Beach of course, a fruity mix of girly flavours that could only make sense when the temperature is ridiculous.